Great post. Right now, it feels like many of need to be guardians and appreciate the guardians where we can, to flourish despite the threat (or hindrance) caused by those controlling the guards.
If you're not already familiar with him, you might enjoy David Whyte's writing. He's a poet/poetic essayist, but the also explores single words through a discerning eye.
Interesting read. I’d add that in many movies, love happens when the main character let their guard down and go on some kind of adventure. The guard isn’t just about keeping others out, it’s also a gatekeeper between the familiar and the unknown.
When you keep the guard, life can become flat, tasteless, frictionless.
So it’s not just that others are kept out.
The person who’s guarded is also locked away from everything that could surprise or move them.
LTS, your suspicions are on point; here is the exact quote:
"It is a question in marriage, to my feeling, not of creating a quick community of spirit by tearing down and destroying all boundaries, but rather a good marriage is that in which each appoints the other guardian of their solitude, and shows them this confidence, the greatest in their power to bestow. A togetherness between two people is an impossibility, and where it seems, nevertheless, to exist, it is a narrowing, a reciprocal agreement which robs either one party or both of its fullest freedom and development. But, once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole and against a wide sky!"
It's not the best we can do; it is the beginning of infinity.
Great post. Right now, it feels like many of need to be guardians and appreciate the guardians where we can, to flourish despite the threat (or hindrance) caused by those controlling the guards.
If you're not already familiar with him, you might enjoy David Whyte's writing. He's a poet/poetic essayist, but the also explores single words through a discerning eye.
Thanks for reading, and the suggestion. Any Whyte in particular?
Interesting read. I’d add that in many movies, love happens when the main character let their guard down and go on some kind of adventure. The guard isn’t just about keeping others out, it’s also a gatekeeper between the familiar and the unknown.
When you keep the guard, life can become flat, tasteless, frictionless.
So it’s not just that others are kept out.
The person who’s guarded is also locked away from everything that could surprise or move them.
“The guard is the gatekeeper between the familiar and the unknown.” That’s brilliant!
think I’m on the fence about “the best we can do for our partner is guard their solitude.”
LTS, your suspicions are on point; here is the exact quote:
"It is a question in marriage, to my feeling, not of creating a quick community of spirit by tearing down and destroying all boundaries, but rather a good marriage is that in which each appoints the other guardian of their solitude, and shows them this confidence, the greatest in their power to bestow. A togetherness between two people is an impossibility, and where it seems, nevertheless, to exist, it is a narrowing, a reciprocal agreement which robs either one party or both of its fullest freedom and development. But, once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole and against a wide sky!"
It's not the best we can do; it is the beginning of infinity.